One knee

I have dreamt of the day when a man would walk into my life, and be so enthralled with ME. He would love and adore me, take time for me, talk with me, do things with me. When I would be giddy, and overwhelmed with love and romance that every song I heard would remind me of him, every word would make me remember some inside joke we had. We would live life together. I have dreamt of the day he would get down on one knee, and tell me how deeply he loves me, and wants to spend life and all of eternity with me. I have dreamt of the day I would be in a white dress, walking out of the castle in down town Salt Lake City, when I would be made the queen for the day publicly, and privately through all of time.

Every girl has. Our barbies get married to Ken. They honeymoon in someplace only our minds can view. We all have watched the movies, and went to bed wishing "that was me". Songs remind us of what we so fiercely seek. We read books like Twilight, and fall in love with another womans fantasy. Alright, so I am a Twilight fan...oh well. I am a fan of other things, but I really love the photography that they [Twilight] provides. It is beautiful and communicates alot of what I feel and long for. So, if you don't like it, sorry.

Why is it that lately, it [relationships] have been on my mind?? The weddings and engagements and baby announcements have calmed down. I haven't had this desire for a long time. I am almost 20...in Utah-man I am be-hind on getting on the couples ride...luckily there isn't one bus.

I want so badly to find love, or be found-however it works. Love is so powerful. I love being in love. That feeling you get, and yes, I know you know what I am talking about.

Maybe my love is at my school, and maybe I met him today, and didn't know it. Or maybe he is some odd 5053 miles away I don't know; I wish to discuss this one that is so far away. I have never met one who made me instantly feel loved-and if it isn't love, then tell me what it is. I felt electricity when we touched, there is no exaggeration, or make-up-believe. I think he felt it too. It made want him so bad it hurt. I don't know what will happen with this. I haven't heard from him in over a year. I still live my life, although, he still intrigues me, my attention, is still his-in the back of my mind.

I just want to be married. (OK, so it wouldn't hurt to have someone like Edward Cullen, who makes Bella weak in the knees with a breathe.) Now. But I don't want to settle. So, I will give life and love a try again.